When the going gets tough …

I’m thankful to be married. Of course, when the “going” that is “tough” is my marriage, it adds a bit of a wrinkle to things. But when the circumstances that surround us are difficult, it is a huge blessing to have each other’s strength to draw from. For the most part, when I have a weak moment, Pete’s there to be strong, and vice versa. And when we happen to weaken at the same moment, at least we can understand each other’s feelings and be weak together.

We have been struggling financially (severely) since June. It’s bad enough that I have to avoid thinking about it for the most part, since thus far there isn’t a clear pathway out of our current circumstances. When I do think about it, I either get angry, or frightened, or distraught. Sometimes it’s a nearly unbearable mixture of the three. But the gift of marriage is that I am never experiencing these struggles alone. We can come together as two people who are experiencing identical difficulties and we can bear up under them together, with the help of the Lord.

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2 thoughts on “When the going gets tough …

  1. This post blessed me to a degree as it made me think back to my rather sometimes tumultous relationship with my late hubby Stephen. He was a wonderful, loving, caring husband who sadly was also an alcoholic. I hadn’t known that when I met him – he was separated from his wife pending a divorce, but doubt if I had it would have made too much difference as I fell head over heels within a week of meeting him! However, once the truth did come out – 2 yrs after we got married, things changed a lot. I spent every possible opportunity watering down his bottles, he spent most hours drinking or sleeping. He was great for 2/3 of the day, but by evening would be a bit more argumentative, and I’d so little patience once the alcohol really showed on him, so we had many fights – mostly instigated and maintained by me. The last one ran for a full 5 days (over Christmas)just prior to his death and while I ranted nonstop, he just sat quietly and never argued back. I often shouted to God (in front of Him) that He should have never given me an alcoholic husband who would never change and do the sensible thing. I wanted to provoke him so much into taking action, but sadly despite numerous attempts it wasn’t to be, and he lost his battle on the 5th January 1998 at the tender age of 43, leaving two beautiful daughters behind him also. I often look back, and wish firstly that my faith had been as strong then as it is now, although recognise that it was losing him that made it like that, but also wanted to say to all my married friends – no matter HOW bad your husband acts or how irritating their behaviour – be grateful for every second that the Lord grants you with them, because one day they may be taken from you, and you will be utterly lost without them. Like any loss, the pain eases, and I can finally be grateful to the Lord for His Perfect Will for both Stephen (who was also a Christian tho lapsed of sorts), and myself. The Lord indeed can be that 3rd person in the 3-braided cord talked about in Ecclesiastes. Blessings, TKR

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